Lots going on in my mind this week. I’ll try to weave it into a coherent narrative. The headline is, however, that I am ever grateful to be part of an organization in which I can make a positive impact on my community.
One of the tag lines we promote is “Strengthening Community”. I think a lot about what that means and how we can do it better. So here is my attempt to try to string a couple of different threads together into something that makes sense. Bear with me!
FIRST: The Atlantic Challenge Crews. Two teams, about 40 people, stayed at the WCY last week during the hottest, most humid weather I’ve experienced here. They arrived early to prepare for the events and the high school was not yet available for them. Since one of the things the WCY does is to fill gaps in the community, I was thrilled to be able to help out.
I related to them on a number of different levels: As someone who traveled around the world when I was 20, I related to a group of young travelers; as a sailor, I admired their commitment to seamanship; as a believer in the power of teamwork, I respected their ability to work together. Though we had to impose significant guidelines on the teams in order to be covered by our insurance company, I felt confident they would live up to those standards. And they exceeded my expectations.
We had two groups; One from Belgium, one from southern Ireland. Each of them had 20 hour + travel days before they arrived. The Belgian team spent more than 26 hours from door to door, finally arriving at the WCY around 1am on Monday morning. The weather was hot and sticky. The WCY doesn’t have air conditioning where they slept. We had members arriving at 5am, and camps needed them to be up and out by 8:30am. Yet, I heard nothing but gratitude for our clammy, humid, hard floors.
We opened our kitchen to the groups. They had lunch taken care of, but were on their own for dinners, I found out. I had hoped to pull together a BBQ, but couldn’t swing it. No matter. Both teams cooked up delicious dinners including stir-fry, tacos, mac and cheese, chicken wings, and sausages. On Wednesday night, the groups occupied the kitchen from 7pm to 9:30pm. Lots of food everywhere, lots of dishes, a certain amount of mess. To be honest, I was afraid I’d be left to clean up. (I didn’t want Betty, our morning custodian, to come in and curse me for letting this happen!) I checked in as they were finishing and silently calculated how long it would take me to re wash the dishes, wipe the counters, and clean the floors. I needn’t have bothered. When I came back at 10pm, the kitchen was clean: dishware drying the rack, floor swept, counters spotless. WOW!
The sailors made use of our pool, drank coffee with members, and engaged in conversation about the differences between our countries. A number of our early morning exercisers commented on how polite everyone was. One member lost a pendant in the deep end of the pool and one of the Belgians swam down to retrieve it.
On Wednesday night, a reporter from the Republican Journal came by to interview the sailors. What a scene! Kyle, the reporter, sat with Maggie from Ireland then Ede from Belgium and learned about the Atlantic Challenge, while a group of Irish sailors built a huge air mattress tower in the background!
I am so happy the WCY has been able to contribute a little bit to the success of the Atlantic Challenge. I am grateful to Arista Holden, who organized this event and asked for our help. And I am grateful to all the people and businesses who donate to the WCY. Knowing that our supporters, especially our Sustaining Sponsors, are committed to the work we do in this community makes it so much easier to take on extra projects like this.
SECOND: Our camps. We have had about 125 children a week running around the WCY for the past five weeks. I’ve heard from parents that after one week, their children asked to come every week because they were having such a good time. And I’ve been told what a difference camp makes in the lives of the families. Having a safe, fun place for their children to go during the day makes it easier to go to work.
Two stories. One was a conversation I witnessed between a camper and counselor while the camper waited in line for the bathroom. The camper spoke almost to herself. I had a sense she was talking without knowing who was listening. She seemed a little lonely as she said, “I have an older sister, who is 9 and a younger brother who is 1.” She added wistfully, “I am a middle child.”
The counselor, responded, “I am a middle child, too.”
“You are?!” I could almost see the camper puff up with pride. And they were comparing notes as I walked away.
I remember being a child at camp and feeling that same sense of pride when one of my counselors said he was also from Denver. I felt like there was someone else in this new world who understood me.
THIRD: Broken Tables. (not so great). I walked down the hallway early Monday morning and was greeted by a call of, “What happened to your tables outside?” When I looked, I saw two plastic tables that had been broken in the middle. It might have been a mistake for someone to try to sit on one table and break it. Seeing two broken in the same way, I imagined that it was intentional. That was a gut punch. We have enough accidental repairs to do. We can’t afford to have things broken intentionally.
It's hard to know what would cause someone to walk to the WCY and intentionally cause damage. I imagine it might come from a frustration with their own lives that they don’t know how to express. I wish I knew how to reach people who feel that is the only way they can be seen and heard.
FOURTH: Reading... I’ve been reading a book on ethics called How Good People Make Tough Choices. It focuses on right vs. right choices. Like when your best friend asks if you think they look good in their new shoes and you don’t. That’s a silly one, not really an ethical choice, but an example of a “truth vs. loyalty” dilemma. A more pointed example might be if a friend says they are going to do something against the rules – do you tell someone to stop it, knowing your friend will get in trouble? Or do you show your loyalty to your friend and allow it to happen?
One of the reasons I work at the WCY is because I believe everyone, especially youth, need opportunities to push the boundaries so that they know where the lines are. (A wise dance teacher from acting school told the class, “Until you fall, you don’t know how high you can leap. So jump as high as you can. When you can’t land it, pull back a bit.” I think something similar happens with children. They push and push and then they feel a push back. And that’s how they know where the boundary is.) Those opportunities are best provided in an environment of trust, where the children feel a sense of belonging and know they are valued.
Since we have so many young people working and playing at the WCY, we have a huge opportunity to help them develop their ethics. Our Y values are Caring, Honesty, Respect, and Responsibility. We try to lead with those values and pass them on to everyone who walks through our doors. Values are not rules. They are not rigid walls limiting our actions. They are guides. They help us navigate those places where there are no guardrails. An English jurist from the 1900’s called this place, the “domain of obedience to the unenforceable.” This is a place without which community disintegrates.
SO! Why is all of this in one post? Let me lay it out: Community breaks down without connections between individuals. Those connections make people want to be obedient to the unenforceable. I saw those connections between the members of the Atlantic Challenge teams. And because they respected themselves, they also respected the WCY. They didn’t’ have to be “good” or to clean up after themselves. But they did.
We build those connections in our camps. We build them in our classes. We build them in our pool, in our hallways, in our sports leagues, in our AOA luncheons.
I am proud to be part of an organization that takes building community seriously. Everyday, we try to lift up people of all ages. We want to engender caring, honesty, respect, and responsibility. We want people to know that they belong. Based on what people tell me, our Y does that. We can’t do without you.
Thank you for being obedient to the unenforceable and, in doing so, strengthening our community.
Russell
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